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It wasnt me, it was the hormones!

I am infuriated.

I have just woken up. Everything that has mildly irritated me in the last few years weeks has now bubbled to the surface and enraged me.

Ohhhh I really hope someone pisses me off today. I feel like I need to tear someone a new a$$hole. The only downfall with this situation is that I can’t yet blame it on the hormones.

Still. I like being angry. I am GOOD at arguing when I’m angry.
I like unleashing my bad ass lawyer debatin skillz.

Douchebags beware. Today, I will destroy you.

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What to accept when you’re expecting

I know that everyone says the first trimester is the worst, and I know I haven’t had it too bad BUT STILL. When people say “it’s not a disease” I feel like slapping them in the face.

I think my symptoms have been made a lot worse by the fact that my husband isn’t here and possibly won’t be here till December – missing the first scan which is on Monday – AND I have injured my back. 

My back is an old issue, but since quitting my last job as a care assistant I haven’t had any issues with it. Now I know what you’re thinking: “you weren’t lifting people properly” but, quite frankly – when you have a patient who’s file actually says you HAVE to drag lift her, then somethings going wrong with the system.  So Yeah, as long as I make sure I bend my knees, keep my back straight etc etc, I’m usually fine.  But ohhhhhnooooooo, not this week.

I’ve been going to circuits on a Tuesday and Thursday to keep up my fitness (to keep the inevitable fat that is to come at bay) and apart from seeing a loss in my cardio fitness, everything seemed to be going fine. (I am hoping this loss is due to fatigue! ) Last Thursday I worked quite hard on my legs and over the weekend they were killing me. I assume from this I must have bent over funny, as I couldn’t move properly due to my thighs feeling like they’d been ABUSED.  So now – I’m a cripple. I can’t bend my back at all and even stitting / lying down is extremely uncomfortable. I read online last night that most people get this sort of pain from there 30’s onwards. I’ve been having it since I was 13! This is ridiculous. 

So hoovering, mowing the lawn, taking the bin out right now is impossible. Cleaning out the cat litter is painful along with picking up anything the dogs knock to the floor. Even just going upstairs is agony!

Add nausea so bad I can’t eat or cook, I have more spots on my face than a teenager –  I NEVER get spots – and my mood swings have gone wild. I have days where I literally want to punch someone in the face. Marc’s lucky he’s not here. 

Apart from all this (!!!) I’ve been fine. No issues with baby (I think) and the weathers been quite nice so it put me in a better mood. 

I now just have to focus on Monday, hope for good news with the body snatcher and a call back from the chiropractor.

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A quick bit of procrastination..

I realised I haven’t posted in a while! That and I’m procrastinating from cleaning the house.

Well, if I haven’t been sleeping this last week (which I have been doing a LOT), then I’ve been travelling on the train to and from weddings! 

Weddings are HARD when you’re in your first trimester.

Thankfully, the first wedding, which I had to travel to London for, was a short and sweet affair.  Down to the registry office, back to the pub, drinks and amazing vegan cupcakes.  Then back to bed for a couple of hours. The second, was a bit more strenuous, but worth it. It was an all dayer  and I tell you – I originally got a room in the hotel where the wedding was held because I thought I would be drunk. That room was the best idea I’ve had. After the wedding breakfast – which in itself was a struggle as baby doesn’t like beef (this is greatly disappointing to me), I popped upstairs for a quick bubble bath and nap . Heaven!

Apart from that, my sick days have gotten worse, I cannot deal with the pet food. This is an issue with my husband being away and 3 animals to feed! It makes me wretch. I dread opening the packets! I have a supply of Yankee candles though and the strong smells seem to help. The vanilla and chai scent is my new best friend!

 

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Apparently, you can’t eat parma ham now.

A comment my sister made just recently after I told my family about the pregnancy. This may be fine to some, but my sister and I are prolific parma ham eaters. The ham doesn’t make it to any cooking, we just buy a pack and eat it. In one sitting. I think she might have taken a small bit of pleasure in telling me this. More parma ham for her.

Anyway, backtracking slightly. Told my parents a couple of days ago. It was quite awkward at first, I didn’t know what to say. I just had to convince myself it was okay and that they would be happy because even though I wish i was 16  I think of myself as being 16, I’m really really not. They were happy anyway as of course they would be – although mum wasn’t happy with how I told her. Apparently I was supposed to draw it out a bit longer, not just blurt it out like word vomit. Bahaha

I think a lot of my side know now, either through me or through dad who HAD to tell someone! Marc wants to keep it a secret on his side though until the 12 week scan which seems so far away! I know his mum will go mad (in a good way) – definitely worth recording the reaction. I’ll have to plan something good.

Apart from that, symptoms have been manageable. Lots of bloating and lots of acid reflux and lots of Gaviscon! Very tired but nowhere near as exhausted as I was last week. If I force myself to stay awake and not have a nap, I’m generally fine and sleep through the night too. Still no throwing up.